New Topshop denim collection

I am not known for my interest in jeans. Sure denim can be useful: in the summer I have plenty of denim short shorts for mooching, and even some Bermudas to wear with heels and a blazer, but jeans? I have maybe three pairs in rotation: some wide legged ones from Gap to wear with Converse & a leather biker jacket, skinny Topshop Baxters that I wear in winter with boots/wellies/whatever I am wearing on my feet to avoid the bone-chilling NY cold, and some rolled boyfriend jeans for slouching around in.

But really, I'm just not a jeans girl, preferring to wear shorts or dresses as for those with good legs, an indifferent middle and an ample bosom, jeans aren't often enormously flattering. That doesn't stop me wanting to wear them tho. I have plenty of pairs in my storage locker, testament to the fact that I have tried - and failed.

And then, of course, there is all the wishful thinking I do. I get releases sent to me that look as if they may hold the key to my jeans antipathy and I imagine myself in the looks on display -but, truthfully, I would need a bucket of Polyjuice Potion to wear the majority.

Today's bout of wishful thinking was courtesy of the Topshop press office who sent out their autumn/fall denim manifesto this morning. They rather optimistically believe that
"For AW09/10 TOPSHOP has all your denim needs sewn up. Whether you’re looking for an
ankle-grazer, a straight-leg, a boyfriend jean, a jogger or the ultimate skinny; with styles featuring rips, slashes, studs, acid washes, paint drips or even sequins, TOPSHOP has your perfect pair."

Moving swiftly past the proffered denim jogging pants, & the promise of a 'denim harem pant' - yes, really - for later in the season, as surely only those who really believe what they read in magazines, are possessed of boundless self-confidence or those under eighteen will wear such things, I swiftly realise that to be cast as a Topshop jean aficionado, the wearer must possess the extremely lithe & toned legs of a supermodel.

The keys styles are:

The Jamie £40
Made from super-stretch denim, the ankle has Topshop’s narrowest ever circumference, 17cm. Washes will include pale grey, faded blue, black & indigo.


The Pullon Jegging £35:
A pull-on jean/legging hybrid with an elasticated waist and drawn-on fly/pocket detail. Versions include ruched sides, stirrups, zips and slits, in a variety of colours & acid washes.

The Cyber Panel Skinny £45
Features zips by the front pockets & raised linear graphic panels at the top front & on the knees.

The Anti-fit £40
Loose around the hips, for a comfortable fit with a tapered ankle. (Surely only for the EXTREMELY brave, as the loose hips & tapered ankle will give the dread carrot leg effect to all but the skinniest Minnies)

There's also a knitted denim jegging, and promise of various ripped/shredded/studded skinny numbers. And Hallelujah, Corey - a boyfriend jean and Martha - a classic straight leg make an appearance in the core collection and are worth a look.

But, if you want to sport a fashion forward pair of jeans this winter, according to Topshop, you'll need matchstick legs and a bucketload of confidence as skinny is the only way to go.